The Four Worst Songs Society Loves

If you've been following my blog for any amount of time, you know I love music. The reason I haven't posted in forever is half because I've been on vacation and half because I was burnt out after churning out almost twenty thousand words about Twenty-One Pilots. Good music is practically my love language. However, to recognize good music, you must also notice the bad.

As stewards of our bodies and minds, we are called to be careful about what we take in. As the saying goes, see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. And music is no exception to that. We are to think on whatever is true and lovely, and thoughts that go against what we believe shouldn't be entertained. How can we do that if we're listening to music that is neither true nor lovely?

At some point, we must each decide where we're going to draw the line. How much profanity is okay in a book you're reading? Would you listen to the same book? What words will you tolerate in a song? Will you sing them and dismiss it or replace them?

This post is not about any of those problems. It is not about songs with heavy profanity or obviously sinful themes. This post is about possibly the most important question: what message will you allow into your mind? This is not only a question for Christians: two of the songs I've included here seem to push human trafficking ideals. Is that what you want to be supporting through music? Is that what you want slowly programmed into your mind?

The four songs I've compiled here are very popular. Some are viral. Some are already condemned by the Christian community. Some (the last one, most notably) are played in every store and from every teen's iPhone - Christian or not. I refuse to listen to a single one.

Dance Monkey - Tones and I

In the Christian community, this song is very often taboo. However, secular spaces tend to play it liberally. Malls, grocery stores, even Kidz Bop has redone this song. And I get it. I really do. It's so, so catchy. The tune is addictive. But the song itself is very poorly written and plants harmful philosophies in our minds, which you can see with a closer look at the lyrics. I encourage you to Google them, but I'll point out a few in particular for you in a second.

The song was written from the perspective of a famous person, showing how degrading it can be to be treated as entertainment rather than as an actual person. On the surface, this seems like an acceptable message. But the song does not come across that way. The song comes across to the average person as told by a person (we'll assume for convenience a woman) who is being forced to do things she does not want to do. At no point in the song does the artist make it seem like it's obviously a bad thing. The pressure to perform is, in the song, just the way of life. There is no hint of refusing to do something you don't want to do - it teaches submission. Let's look at the lyrics.

They say, "Move for me, move for me, move for me, ay-ay And when you're done, I'll make you do it all again."

This is the most harmful lyric in the song. It is repeated over and over, and the lesson people subconsciously hear is exactly what the lyric says: people who like you for your body will force you to do things you don't want to do, and you must carry through. This is the last line of the verse; there is no follow-up or redemption. There is no "say no." There is no "actually, you should punch him in the face." She dances, and when they like it, they force her to continue. Make is the key word in this line. They are not asking for consent. They are not requesting a performance. They are forcing the woman to move because they like it. And when she says she's done? They make her continue.

Just like a monkey, I've been dancing my whole life But you beg to see me dance just one more time

This is where we see the title of the song. The song is named after what the woman feels she is: a monkey, caged up so people can gaze fascinated through the bars as she swings around and shows off for them. But again, there is no hint of disapproval. To the mature, skilled reader, the first line may seem annoyed or exasperated. But to an impressionable person (be it young child or simply a naive person), this is just stated as a fact of life. The woman has been reduced to a zoo attraction, and never is there a hint of sadness for this fact because of the passive nature of the song. In the first line, she is saying she is tired: we know this from the background of the song. But the next line refutes it. These lines say, "I've been showing off for you my whole life, I'm sick of it. But you want more of me. So I'll deliver."

I say, "Oh my [gosh] I see you walking by Take my hands, my dear, and look me in my eyes"

This line comes directly before the lines we just looked at, forming a complete verse. With the knowledge of where this song is coming from and the background of why it is written, we see something different when these lines are put in front of the last two we studied. Here, the woman is begging to be seen. She is tired of people looking at her body, her "style" and the "way you move" being the things people (men specifically) want. She wants someone to look her in her eyes, to hold her hands, to see her for who she is. And then come the lines we just looked at, telling us she wants someone to see her for real, "but you just beg to see me dance just one more time." Again, to the trained ear, there is a dismay here. We can analyze and find this meaning in the verse. But the song does not center on the hopelessness of this verse, telling us clearly this is a bad thing. It centers on the words of the (hypothetical) men - "Dance for me, dance for me, dance for me... and when you're done, I'll make you do it all again."

Baby, It's Cold Outside

Every Christmas, music is one of the biggest celebrations. From the minute the door closes behind the last Thanksgiving guest to after the lights are taken down and the ornaments are back in the basement, Christmas songs are on a loop across the country. But it's like any other genre; there are good ones and bad ones. We file the bad ones away and play the good ones on repeat.

But almost no one can bear to part with Baby, It's Cold Outside. The song is adored by many. Some people even claim it as their favorite Christmas song. It's been redone hundreds of times by amazing artists. It's been recorded by Michael Bublé, Dolly Parton, Meghan Trainor, Frank Sinatra, Ella Fitzgerald, Dean Martin, Kelly Clarkson, Ray Charles, Idina Menzel, the Glee cast, and was included in the Christmas movie Elf. Andy Gullahorn and his wife even redid it at one point, although they changed the lyrics and made it better. And while it gets a little backlash, it certainly doesn't get enough. It's played in stores and kids' movies and on the radio and even at church functions.

What, you ask, is so wrong with this beloved Christmas classic?

Baby, It's Cold Outside is a call-and-response style song. It was released around 1949, and in 2018, radios got so many complaints about its lyrics that it was banned for a while. Soon enough, though, the lyrics were ruled clean enough for it to be played, and now controversial opinions are few and far between. The premise of the song is that the woman is at the man's house, and when the time comes for her to leave, he protests, telling her that it's too cold outside and that she should just stay with him.

Many lovers of the song bring up that, in the 1940s, it was pretty much completely unacceptable for a woman to spend the night at a man's house. The song was written as a "playful flirtation" and sort of made an excuse for a woman to stay with a man. If she was really going to freeze on the way home, would it have been right of her loving partner to make her leave and die of hypothermia on the way home rather than allow her to crash on his couch? That's the question lovers of the song ask. But as Christians, should we really be inventing excuses to get around rules that help us stay above reproach? We are called to be above reproach and keep our reputations Christ-honoring. A single woman spending the night at a man's house alone before they are married is not above reproach in today's world and neither was it when the song was written. The song knows that it is not above reproach or socially acceptable: at one point, the woman says, "The neighbors might think... there's bound to be talk tomorrow... at least there will be plenty implied." Clearly, the song is making excuses to be below reproach and the writers knew it. Why, then, would we support a song that uses predatory banter to excuse a couple not staying above reproach?

Predatory banter, you ask? Since when is it predatory? Sure, the song is about a couple making some poor decisions to avoid social expectations put in place to uphold their clean reputations, but predatory?

Yes. And that is the reason I can't stand the song. It only takes a short look at the lyrics to see that the man does not really care about her. Similar to the man in Dance Monkey, the man in Baby, It's Cold Outside is not concerned about the woman's reputation, feelings, family, or emotional state. He simply wants her for her body and is using manipulative language to try to get her to do as he wishes. Take a look at some of his lines and you'll see what I'm saying.

I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice... Mind if I move a little closer? What's the sense in hurting my pride?... And your lips look delicious, like waves upon a tropical shore - gosh, your lips are delicious... [Some versions omit] I thrill when you touch my hand How can you do this thing to me? Think of my lifelong sorrow if you got pneumonia and died...

I'll be the first to say, yes, I picked the man's absolute worst lines in the song. But that's the point. At first, the first line I quoted seems harmless. But upon understanding the man's character in the song, it becomes just another thing he notices about her body. He never says I love you. He never compliments anything but her physical attributes. His comments about her eyes being "like starlight" and his offer to take her hat, coupled with a compliment on her hair, just become more empty words about how she looks. He calls her "beautiful" repeatedly. All of these compliments can be lovely on their own, but when they are the backbone of a relationship, the man's true character quickly comes through.

When we see that the man is only after the woman's physical body and not really in love with her, the other lines in the song become much more off-putting. For three verses she refuses him, yet still he asks, "Mind if I move in closer?" He manipulates her, essentially saying, "So instead of staying here where you're safe, you're going to ruin my pride and break my heart by leaving?!" Five full verses into her protests, he is still overcome by physical desire for her, creepily cooing "Your lips look delicious." The lyric then changes to "Gosh, your lips are delicious,'" implying that despite lack of consent, he has kissed her since singing the line the first time. But the man's lines are not half so disconcerting without the woman's lines to add to the narrative.

Maybe just a half a drink more - say, what's in this drink? I wish I knew how to break this spell... I ought to say no, no, no, sir, at least I'm gonna say that I tried... The answer is no... Say, lend me your coat?... Why don't you see?

An examination of these lines shows something even more alarming about the man in the song. First, the alarming realization that he drugs her drink. He tells her "put some records on while I pour!" and at first this seems harmless enough, but followed by these lines from the woman, it's clear that he's slipping her some sort of mild sedative or date-rape drug. She is a little suspicious, asking "what's in this drink?" and then says "wish I knew how to break this spell," which is out of character for the rest of the song (she never says anything remotely similar again) and implies that she is very dazed or out of it. Those lines are soon followed by "at least I'm gonna say that I tried," which can either be taken as "oh well, I guess I have no choice but to stay!" or "he's not going to stop no matter what I say. At least I've tried." I think the second options fits much better with the story - she's just been drugged, "at least I tried" is an understandable thought to have.

But the song doesn't see her actually pass out, hence the drug presumably being very mild (but still, uh, he drugged her). She continues refusing, telling him "the answer is no" just before the presumable kiss leading to his remark "gosh, your lips are delicious." This proves what I alluded to before - there is no "no means no" in this song. It is a manipulation from start to finish.

At the end, the woman even tells him, "lend me your coat." Here, she is acknowledging his claim. Okay, she says, it's cold outside. If you're so worried, lend me a coat. This is where we see that he doesn't actually care about her wellbeing. A true gentleman would jump at the chance. In fact, there would be no song with a real gentleman - she would say "I have to go" and he would immediately respond "it's so cold, take my best coat or let me drive you home." But that is not the man of this song. He just wants her to stay with him - for her body.

That's no harmless Christmas song.

Take Me To Church - Hozier

I enjoy Hozier. I like a lot of his songs. The theme of a lot of them is the idea of the woman he loves making his life better (often using the metaphor of her digging him from the ground). This does not bother me at all. I only care about how I interpret the song - if Hozier thinks the woman saved him from eternal death, sorry, buddy, only Christ can do that. But I interpret the songs as regular love songs, showing the imperfect reflection of Christ and the Church God created in marriage and how God uses other people to point us to Himself.

Take Me To Church is his most popular song and follows the same theme of a woman saving him from himself, but takes it twelve steps too far (especially for the Christian). This song is just full of idolatrous language, showing him worshipping the woman he loves rather than the God who is Love. This one doesn't take much explaining at all - if you're a Christian, you should abandon the song immediately (if you don't already detest it). If you aren't Christian, I hope you find it disturbing to worship any human (especially with such devotion as is found in the song), but if you don't, there's not much I can do to dissuade you. Just look at the lyrics.

I should've worshipped her sooner... My church offers no absolutes - she tells me "worship in the bedroom" - the only heaven I'll be sent to is when I'm alone with you... Take me to church, I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies - I'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife...

I think that is absolutely enough of that complete nonsense. Does it make your skin crawl? Because it should, and it makes me sick to listen to. I'm repulsed to have it typed out on my blog. Allow me to give you some truth to make up for it.

Since we have now been justified by His blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through Him! For if, while we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to Him through the death of His Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through His life! Not only is this so, but we also boast in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation. Romans 5:9-11

I hope that did something to put your mind at ease. Though bad, the next one is not so horrible.

Ordinary - Alex Warren

This is the one that gets on my nerves the most in this list. It. Is. Everywhere. Grocery stores. Clothes stores. Home decor stores. Cafes. Restaurants. The kid riding past your house on his bike is playing it. That one girl at youth group has it on a shirt and raves about seeing it in concert. The pastor's kids play it on repeat and hum it after the service.

I'm happy to say it's better than Take Me To Church. But not by much. 90% of the song is fine, and then Warren turns it on its head by making the whole thing another gross picture of idolatry through just a couple of lyrics.

The angels up in the clouds are jealous knowing we've found something so out of the ordinary - You got me kissin' the ground of your sanctuary... At your altar I will pray...

After reading the chorus, it becomes clear what the song is really about. The man believes that the woman he loves is honestly better than anything Heaven has to offer, and therefore worships her (in her own sanctuary, nonetheless), even going so far as to pray to her.

When you see what the song is really about, more metaphors appear. The first verse is about the world being devoid of faith - "The holy water's watered down and this town's lost its faith - our colors will fade eventually" - which implies that the rest of the song is a solution to that problem. The song says if no one has faith anymore, I'll make you my god. Furthermore, Warren hides little references to Christian faith through the song. Return me to dust is a reference to the creation of man in Genesis, implying that Warren also believes that the woman he loves created him. You're the sculptor, I'm the clay is another reference to the relationship between God (the sculptor) and man (the vessel of clay) in Scripture. I saw your light is a call to God being the Light. Similar to Hozier in Take Me To Church, Warren corrupts the Biblical image of Christ and the Church that is found in the gift of marriage. Rather than portraying marriage as a cracked mirror of Christ's love for the Church, His bride, he portrays a woman as an idol, a fake god he has created.

Yet Christians love it as much as the rest of the world.

Generally, I don't care what an artist meant when they were writing the song as long as I can interpret it well. Some songs aren't conducive to Christian or clean interpretation. These four, specifically, are songs I won't put up with because there's no room for other interpretation. The harmful messages are too prevalent, and they will sneak into your subconscious under the cover of a catchy tune and resurface at all the wrong times. You think they're doing nothing to you until one day you realize that you've been idolizing your partner or making excuses to go below reproach. It's like profanity; it doesn't go in one ear and out the other, your brain stores it and desensitizes you to it. Next thing you know, it comes out when you don't mean for it to.

So, what do you think? Do you listen to any of these songs, and have I convinced you to leave them in your dust? What other songs do we listen to without thinking about what they mean?